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lutang!

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JM posted on my wall. @_@ that kinda made my day. no, it actually made my entire uhhmm 2 days! i dunno, he's too cool. we're getting closer i guess and it feels awkward. and i think it's because i still have a crush on him so err, how do i explain this? i panic inwardly when my crushes are near, so... yeah. he.he.he. i could remember how cold i turn when he's within 10 meters and my friends are teasing me. i swear i could freeze those jerks to death.

who would've thought diba? who would've fucking thought.

communication. part of why i don't see my majorcrushes as future boyfriends is that i cannot freely communicate with them. you need that right? someone you can pour yourself at with all freedom, without restrictions, someone who's comfortable to be with. even at your worst. even in silence. i don't feel that way with my majorcrushes, unless the feelings i have for them have died and were replaced with a brewing friendship. yeah that's a different story. but reallllyyyy now, can you imagine me with someone i terribly have a crush on? i don't. it has to be rooted at something else, like friendship! then you'll hear me complaining about not wanting to risk the friendship for something as uncertain as relationships. i don't know. my mind is a mess when it comes to things like this. i thought i was mature enough to handle these thoughts. then i think maybe love isn't supposed to be thought over. it just happens. how i wish i could be my own cupid.

Lord, give me a lovelife? i seriously don't have one. i'm at the right age i guess... to fall in love. ah right. i already did. let's rephrase that. Lord, it's high time for me to fall in love AGAIN. the hormones are kicking in. i don't wanna disappoint them, cos when they hibernate, my life will become extremely dragging and i might never consider looking at the male species again. what a bore.

ok, just give me a good book to read? the 500 people you meet in hell by jessica zafra, please? it's missing in the library! can't afford to buy books right now i'm kinda broke. >_<

btw, i just learned that mr. tony stark is our country's former national treasurer! wooow, and i dined with him. i feel honored. and i thought he was just a mere investment executive. srsly, i've never met someone as gentlemanly as he is. he's just too... TONY STARK. haha fits him perfectly.

haha Lord, give me a sign. nyahaha