Life Lately

✱ Reading 

I've been stuck on Surrounded by Idiots for months but I don't want to quit it because it feels wrong lol. You know when you get a really boring books it takes ages for you to finish and it's frustrating because you can't skip to the next one without feeling weird that you abandoned a book 46% into it? But man, I'm three books behind my goal for 2022 Goodreads Challenge and I can't lose traction just because of a boring book. There has to be a way to overcome this. Yeah, I'm skimming it. That's it. 

✱ Watching

Nothing, at last! We finally finished She-Hulk: Attorney At Law this afternoon which was a relief hahaha. To be honest I didn't like the show. I can't say anything good about it. Oh wait I think I have one, it's *spoiler alert* Hulk's son.

Ever since episode one I've prepared myself for the worst and to be fair, episode after episode it keeps getting worse. Oh my God.

So what's wrong exactly?

• The script. It's so badly written, full of preachy woke agenda that doesn't add to the plot, if there's even one.
• The comedy is so forced it's so cringe.
• Wasted characters. Tatiana for one, I had a lot of expectations. She was the antagonist I was waiting for, or Mallory even, or better yet -- Nikki. I'll find that more convincing, women encounter more bitches than sons of bitches in real life, believe me.
• Ruined characters, most of them men, of course. They reduced every male character in the show to either wimps, incels, or idiots just to elevate the women in the show. To be honest, I would give it a pass because some are new characters I'm not familiar with so you can introduce them however you want.
• But to reduce already established characters like The Hulk, Wong, and Daredevil? They were made so uncharacteristic just to prevent them from stealing the spotlight.
• Very shallow plot. Which is kinda reflective of the whole modern-day feminist movement and the real weight of their agenda. Oops.
• No character development. I think the writers wanted to show how Jen struggled between her two identities and eventually learned to embrace them both. I was waiting for that to unfold. But it wasn't shown anywhere. She just said she can be both at the end, but again, there was no proof. Much like everything she complained about being a woman on episode 1, all but an echo. She has no arc.
• As a law comedy it already failed on a legal front, and it's not funny too. Now I don't know what to call it.
• Jen kept breaking the fourth wall to remind us it's her show, which was cute at first, but eventually became pathetic. Up to the last episode she's been trying to claim the show. Which is weird because it's already named after her. It's such a weirdly insecure act for someone who is so self-assured.

I guess, in true woke fashion, the series is trying to show who the real antagonists are, which is everyone who didn't like She-Hulk haha. Wow. I must admit, they've really mastered the art of victimhood. Congrats! They made it required watching, baited everyone into the anticipated cameos, and yet they couldn't just make it into a good show? They just really want to push the agenda so they can make sexists of everyone who disagree. They knew it sucked and thought it was a gotchu moment lol.

✱ Listening

To BP Valenzuela on YouTube music. 

✱ Thinking

About what day of the week to come to work.

I'm in the office right now and I kinda like the spot where I'm in; row's end beside the window. I haven't been able to sit where I used to (which is beside my teammate) ever since I started coming in at 3pm and even though there's no shortage of seats around here, I don't like the fact that I have to worry about not knowing where to sit as soon as I get to the floor. It gives me anxiety, you know. The same dread an outcast feels coming in to a cafeteria full of people. Which is why I'm considering coming in on Mondays or Fridays instead. I'm still not sure.

Generally, I want to avoid days where I have meetings because I prefer to take them at home. And the only days I have no regular meetings are Wednesdays and Fridays. The good thing about Wednesday is that I get to see one of my teammates cos he comes in Tues-Thurs. We have a short overlap where I can ask questions and stuff and kinda just show myself, and that's good. My husband also comes to his office on Wednesdays, so we get to leave the house together. It's pretty practical for us. On the day we both work in the office I don't have to prepare dinner so we can both eat out. The only downside to coming in on Wednesdays is that a lot of people also come to work on Wednesdays, as I have observed, and obviously I want to avoid them haha. 

Let's take a look at Friday. I haven't tried coming in on a Friday. I think less people come to the office on this day so I wouldn't have to worry about looking for a seat. But also, I have no teammate to personally bother lol, aaaand I think traffic is generally bad on this day. Especially when it falls on a payday. 

So yeah, I guess Wednesday is really the obvious choice. 

✱ Smelling

My breath pollute my face mask.

✱ Wishing

For some clarity at work. I have a task now, and I don't know what to do. I'm currently in the information gathering phase, which isn't looking so good because I don't have a clear plan. What I know is that I need to make an as-is process documentation to really understand what they do, get the right access to relevant sites so I can emulate what they do, learn how automations are developed and deployed here (what I'm currently stressing about), and finally develop and deploy everything properly. I think I know what to do but I don't have a template for it.

What I want to do properly though is maintain a Confluence site for all of the details of this project. I really wanna learn how to do things here properly, but I'm not even teammates with the people who can help me from a development standpoint. And in order to move forward I have to really reach out, and I suck at reaching out because I'm not really the proactive type huhu. This stresses me out so much.

Part of me wants to delay this until my new teammate comes in so we can tread together. I blame myself for asking for work too early lol I could have just enjoyed the months until my new teammate comes haha.

✱ Wearing

Blouse, denim leggings, and sneakers.

✱ Loving

♥ That I got to roam around High Street earlier. I reached the almost far end of the strip, where Fully Booked is.
♥ Got 50 off on my coffee at CBTL too. It's not as good though, their cafe latte, I don't recommend CBTL anymore. Muji's is better, and cheaper too.
♥ Had dinner at Salad Stop, ordered Oh Crab Lah wrap. Love it!

✱ Wanting

To get our house cleaned. I have "general cleaning" scheduled every month on my calendar but sometimes I forget until it comes to a point where I couldn't walk barefoot at home anymore because it's too dusty. We've always had a dust problem at home. With the amount of construction happening around our condo, it's a must to vacuum every single day otherwise we'd be dead of allergies.

There are five parts to getting the house really clean: CR cleaning, surface cleaning, floor cleaning, decluttering, and organizing. I cannot do everything in just one session. Good thing I scheduled for a deep cleaning tomorrow, they'll take care of the first three parts. Looking forward to having the house clean again! 

✱ Needing

Uhm, to really make some good progress at work. Please pray for me! 

✱ Feeling

My head hurt. I need to go home now.

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Image Source - Pexels

Work From Home

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Everything material is immaterial

I wanted to share a lot of things that happened in the past couple of weeks but it feels too late now like all of the emotions I have at the time have gone already so I couldn't write about it blow by blow. But let me try...

On October 1, on the way to IKEA we got into a traffic accident involving an SUV. I was merging lanes, thought it gave way, then BAAAM!! Apparently not. We were already halfway into the lane when the car behind us slowly moved forward. It scraped our car from the driver's door and went on until our sidemirror folded. Ironically, it all happened so slowly. Yep. Slowly. It looked very intentional. Only a sad asshole would assert its way in that manner. But because it happened slowly we thought maybe the driver wasn't looking, was preoccupied with other things and didn't notice the car in front has already moved forward significantly. And us on the other hand, saw it as an opportunity to merge, one that the car behind generously provided us. But nope.

I spent the week after that gathering info from our insurance provider and demanding payment from the driver. We exchanged fb's and I asked for a very conservative 2.5k to cover the participation fee from our insurance provider. In which she responded, "what about my damage?". Wow, she clearly has one on the head. Lol at the audacity of this kid. I told her her damage is her fault. And it is. I shouldn't even care that she's wearing a mourning pin, is on the way to a funeral, when she carelessly inflicted damage on our vehicle. But that glaring black square on her white shirt was the first thing I noticed and admittedly when I saw that I didn't know what to do next. I offered my condolences but that's not really why my mind blanked out. I don't know. I was just shocked. And in my state of shock and confusion I forgot to get her number, the offending vehicle's plate, and its OR/CR. The only essential thing I got is a copy of her driver's license. The plate number we recovered through our dashcam. Damn.

Thankfully she was responsive on fb, but not at the rate I prefer considering the urgency at which I want to get over this with. She paid up, eventually, and all is good. But not after threatening her that it's either 2.5k or the insurance company will run after her for the full cost of repairs, and we'll have to put this on blotter so it will show up in her records. Considering her age which I got from her driver's license, if she starts looking for a job she won't get a police clearance. That should make for an easy choice.

Only God knows how the hell she didn't notice a car halfway merged in front of her. We weren't even cutting, if we were then the impact would be fast. She had all the time to slow down and pull to a stop and she didn't. Seems like she wasn't looking at all. Hay. I could only hope she learns from this. I mean, if you're not in the right headspace, being in mourning and shit, you shouldn't be driving. Don't be a danger to the people around you right?? Urgh.

After the incident we tried to salvage whatever good is left of our day by still going to IKEA to do what I had planned to do: buy some home decor and eat meatballs. I was only able to do the former because the line at the Swedish Restaurant was ridiculously long. I was happy with my purchase though. I got three Knoppangs and a Fejka. Still doesn't compensate for getting into a traffic accident. Urgh. Plus IKEA on a payday weekend is such a bad idea. It was so crowded and chaotic.

I still drove on the way home despite my trauma from the incident. I've always hated the route going to and from MOA. It always gets crazy the moment you enter EDSA extension. All types of vehicles are in one crazy riot: trucks, jeeps, buses, motorcycles, trykes, private cars, even pedicabs can you believe it argh.

On the way home we stopped by Poco Deli to get a late lunch when I realized my wedding ring is missing. Wow. That is strike two for the fucking first of October. Obviously I felt even more down. Could the other driver have taken it? Was there some hocus focus that happened earlier? Is her mourning pin fake? Lol

When we got home I just cried at my husband complaining about how bad this day was. He hugged me and comforted me all night. We were together the whole day but he wasn't as fazed as I was. He says today was a very interesting day and brought up very convincing points as he was consoling me:

1. Don't worry about the car because we've been meaning to have our bumper fixed anyway so let's just consider this incident as a final reminder to get the bumper fixed haha
2. Don't worry about the ring because we could have his melted and turned into two rings, we've been meaning to have his resized anyway cos it's gone loose now
3. You got your IKEA haul and we had a good lunch at Poco Deli, and we got to buy legit Vienna sausage lol

That was very enlightening for me. You know, that whole night I was just so disheartened all I did was come to my husband to cry and get a hug. It is very comforting getting a warm hug from someone you love. He made me realize that everything I worry about is material, and ultimately immaterial. Every dejected thing about this day shall pass. 

And it did.

It's been three weeks since the incident and everything's been sorted out. Actually, the next few days already felt like retribution. Like I mentioned above, the driver paid up. And aside from that, when I called insurance turns out we didn't have to pay for anything. It's our first claim for the policy period so participation fee is waived. The entire claiming process was also a breeze. We just had to bring the car to the auto shop for assessment and pay for notary of affidavit. We didn't even have to write the affidavit, they took care of everything. Yeah, including making up a story, if you get what I mean. Since we're not going after the offending driver anymore we had to file for self-damage claim. The owner and one of his guys was bouncing off ideas on what to put on the details of the affidavit, and in end we settled for a story which they assured us would get past through insurance. They told us not to worry, cos they know them all too well. This story works so let's stick with it. 

Guys. That experience was interesting, to say the least. We just met a Saul Goodman. And despite putting our integrity in question, we felt super relieved after. So this is how this works huh? This is how the world works?

Two weeks later we brought the car back so they can start with repairs. Here's to hoping they do a good job with it!

Finally, to put an end to all the stress I sustained from that unfortunate first of October, miraculously, my wedding ring turned up. Turns out I dropped it at Poco Deli! I never considered looking there because it was where I realized I lost it so naturally I would retrace my steps, Poco Deli not being in that trail. And by God, I wouldn't have asked there if the guard at Unimart hadn't told me to try checking with Poco Deli first while the admin officer is on break. I didn't really have any hope left in me that day, so whatever, even though I was convinced it isn't the place to look for, I have nothing to lose anyway so might as well. And then can you believe it, when I approached the counter and asked the crew if they found a ring when we dined here last Saturday, they heaved a confirmative "aaah", and lo and beaaahld, they actually have my ring! Oh my God! I was in such a good mood we had celebratory sushi at Dough and Grocer. Their assorted Aburi Oshi oshi is delicious!

I can't believe it. Everything was solved within the week. First we learned we didn't have to pay anything for participation and repairs, then the driver who hit us paid up, and finally I found my ring. I'm still reeling from how things turned around that quick, putting all my worries and tears in vain.

Thank God for my husband, he's been a great refuge in that trying week. He kept me sane. Even though we already both know what to do, which is to get the car fixed and accept that I lost my wedding ring, I was too focused on the process, anticipating the worst, that I lose sight of the goal. My husband, on the other hand knows that what we want to happen will eventually happen so why worry? 

Yeah I get his point, I just don't know if I'm capable of that haha.

Ahh, thank you Lord. ♥

If you've reached the end of this post, wow, thank you for enduring my rambling!!!