some xlife crisis (wanted: career advice?)

x being some prefix i don't recall. something very common to 20 somethings who are overly confused with what they want to do with their lives. hahaha midlife ba yun or quarterlife ewan.

anyway, i think it's not bad for me to explore. i mean, i'm almost 23 but i still don't have a definite career path for myself. not that it's too late ha but yes, i'm on that what-should-i-do-with-my-career phase. when i was in college, i've always thought IT was all programming and shiz. but right now i'm discovering an endless list of opportunities in the industry alone and i'm pretty stoked to see where else i would fit! 

so here are uhm, 5 career paths i've considered for myself... so far!

1. argh. i'm kindof done convincing myself that programming and software development is not for me, even though i haven't had 2 years of experience to say for sure. basta, i know. my heart's not in it. in any case, you know how they all say time's the best teacher? yeah. in the slight chance i see myself still stuck where i am today, we'll see. hmm.

2. some days i think about learning about web design and development, then working for start ups or freelancing. eventually i shrug at the thought of risk.

3. besides being an IT person, i also think i'm inclined to sales/marketing or something. online selling is something i want to try out, like seriously. i just have to find the perfect product line for me! this is something i don't find too risky cos i can always do it in the sidelines. anyway, besides selling prepaid load products and make up, i'm on/off at sulit/ebay naman so i think i can handle an actual e-store! this actually excites me! >XD

4. the riskiest path i probably see on my so called 'career map' is to go back to school to study the arts, nail it (lol) and become a full-fledged artist major in web and graphic designs. that's a lot of money and time to invest that's why i'm never fully decided on it. but i would really really love to. but 4 years and hundreds of thousands is not something i can commit to in a snap. not when you're 22 and counting.

5. the most practical path to cross if i were to really dismiss where i am right now is to just try something new in IT. whatever that is, some new technology, new function, new... oh wait you know where i'm going. you know, i'm also at this point where i just want to break free and discover what else this industry holds for me. lol

oh well. >XD

depressing!

if you look closely at what i do, you'd probably think i'm being overpaid for the level of work i'm delivering. heck you'd probably think i'm bored to the core and is looking for more challenging tasks. SO EFFING WRONG. i'm not looking for a challenge, right now i just want to finish what i'm tasked to do. and you know what, i feel like i'm doing the easiest task na nga eh, and yet i'm taking a lot of time. feeling ko tuloy i'm a freaking cause of delay. though technically we're not really delayed but the people around me are like all finished with their tasks and i'm the only one left with an unmarked to-do item. i mean, there's not even a timeline yet, these people just have nothing else to do so they do advance work which is super cool. then they deliver it even before the official timeline has started. in effect, i'm the only one left 'not doing her job'.

oh don't get me wrong. i'm very impressed with my teammates. they're all frigin' good, they learn fast and honestly they know better than i do. i can totally admit they're more technically competent than i am, considering that i'm a year older in the company. wish i could blame it on my learning curve, but now i'm thinking if i'm probably just a mismatch. AGAIN?!

seriously... 3 years of college, a colorful transcript, a shiny medal, 16 months (and counting) of experience... and here i am thinking MAYBE i'm not programmer material after all?

oh Lord. 

Million People March @ Ayala

rant ahead.

i understand the cause and i understand the honest sentiments of the people behind this yet another million people march. i agree that the pork barrel issue must remain on top of the headlines for as long as those bastarded senators, congressmen, etc. are punished accordingly. i believe that as tax paying citizens we are obliged to be vigilant of what happens to our money. i empathize with those who take all the time and effort to keep the people's anger alive. i agree that it's important that this issue never die, and i believe that only we can do that. as a democratic country, this kind of outrage is not to be ignored by the government. and that's what we want, for the government to not easily dismiss the issue, and for this issue to be strong enough to withstand any politically motivated distraction.

BUT *here we go* this ayala MTM brought a lot of hassle to many of us commuters who just want to go home and rest on a friday night. thankfully i wasn't affected by the traffic since i arrived at the office before 10. i noticed the bus was also pretty fast this morning, considering maybe that it was trying to beat the scheduled road blocks at ayala. hehe. anyway, here are some of the inconveniences i faced tonight because of this million people march

// road blocks = traffic
on the way home, i usually walk to MRT so i didn't care if no buses or jeepneys passed by ayala. but that's just me! how about those who take the bus everyday? hm. well they could walk where the buses take a detour right? they could also just take the MRT or walk all the way to edsa and hail a bus there. yes they could. no problem. but haaaaay.

// concert
i only heard of this rally today so i thought ayala will be closed only for the duration of the rally. i didn't know there was a concert. fine, a concert is fun. but to hold it in the MIDDLE OF THE STREET? as in at the intersection of paseo and ayala ON A FRIDAY?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! i wonder if the concert was planned too late that they weren't able to reserve ayala triangle anymore, cos i think that's a way better venue than holding it in the streets, prolonging the road blocks, causing more traffic, and encouraging more people to join cos they're gonna be caught in it any way. argh.

you'd think some companies dismissed their employees early so they could join in the cause? NO. that's a choice of course but it's more out of concern that they'd be caught in so much traffic and hassle if they left later. buti pa sila sensitive!

// super heavy rain
i'm not gonna blame this on the MPM but this made my night worse. i arrived at zuellig to fetch jeckie super wet and tired and all. hay

if this is their way of reaching out to the tax payers of makati central business district, you know, by inconveniencing them on a friday of all days, WELL DONE.

anyway. i'm sorry. i may be overreacting. i just can't get over that concert blocking the way!

giving up on mortal instruments (for a while) and re-reading dan brown!

dan brown is now officially one of my favorite authors! on par with paulo coelho, and above sidney sheldon and judith mcnaught. brown has this level of technicality na ang sarap basahin. yung minsan nakakabobo pero compelling parin. haha! or maybe because it's the book itself, Digital Fortress, that i'm reading right now. you know, being an IT person, i have like an idea of the stuff he's talking about kaya sobrang interesting parin, even on my second read. haha

by the way! i added an image widget to update you on what i'm currently reading. AS IF! hahaha e bat ba, cute kaya may picture man lang sa gilid hehe 

i don't know if it's bad but even if i was taught how to read fast before, di ko sya ma-master! the technique was to read in segments to let your mind process words as a phrase, not word per word. it also says not to read aloud mentally pero kasiiii i find it better to read that way, the slow way, the word per word way, cos that way i get to bask in a plethora of words and engulf myself completely in that alternate universe the book offers. i hardly get that by reading fast. i hardly read fast anyway. haha. 

what i'm saying is, take time with your book. who cares if you're a slow reader? there's no pop quiz after.

on the other hand, reason why i'm temporarily giving up on City of Bones: ANG LANDI KASI! well sorry na, maybe i'm not so all-over this young adult genre. pero honestly ah, i was caught with the world building. i was interested on how their "underworld" will unfold slowly as the story progresses pero naman kasi i'm so over teenagers being so teenybopper with each other. pwede naman unimplied na lang yung romance which is waaaay waaaay better than affirming your unsuspecting hormones about a romance bound to interrupt the book's "world engine" (in reference to man of steel! haha). argh. 

all right, back to work. woot! it's 5% friday! LOL

defeat, regrets, relief

during the past few days i was so expectant that last night would bring me the freedom i needed to escape from all of this stress. despite the process being in itself stressful, i thought it was a necessary trade if i were to be deemed deserving to walk out in this dark tunnel, you know, with a promising light to follow. 

chos.


nalulungkot ako. last night was more depressing than relieving for me. i only felt relieved because that 'necessary stress' was finally over, but then it was really over. like there's nothing more for me from there. i felt defeated because i know i wasn't going to get in. i'm not the person they're looking for. i'm a mismatch. and it sucks that i made quite an impression that i'm not open to something new. which is dang wrong. i was made to choose, and i chose that which i have been familiar for years. i forgot that the very reason i was there was to explore other options, take risks, and ultimately leave this place.

now i'm regretful. it feels like i'm stuck in a rut, unwilling to face any challenges, and forever mentally stressed to the core.

when will this ever end.

[Review] my xend experience

ang cool naman. it's my first time to use xend courier service (http://xend.com.ph) and i'm pretty impressed! 

i scheduled for a pickup on 1:40pm, hoping na umabot sa 2pm cut-off nila for same day pickups. 

and guess what, the courier arrived at 3:30pm! and i didn't have to confirm anything, as in bigla na lang dumating (well the front desk informed me naman shempre haha)! ang bilis diba? considering na i put an office address pa! lol

kudos to xend na rin for having a very well versed pickup guy (lol, can't think of a better term!). i didn't have to go back to my cubicle to fetch my account number hehe. plus he gave me a pad of waybills for my future shipments. yehey! actually you can have this requested, they give it for free! >XD

i'll definitely choose xend on my next orders na. haha

in fairness ha mejo naeenjoy ko tong pabenta benta kong to, imagine before i had to go to the nearest and cheapest courier pa to ship items but now i can have them picked up at my place of choice! so convenient and cheap! hello naman na 89 pesos lang for a provincial delivery (59 for metro manila) ohaaa! 

anyway, my story doesn't end here, i have to chart how long the shipment arrives to its destination pa, which is a provincial area na mejo binabagyo ngayon. oh well. we'll see!

free waybills :)

so far so good! will update this when the item has arrived. hehe

[UPDATE!]

as of September 26, 2013 4:30pm
buyer informed me that he has already received the item! yehey! that's 2 days for a provincial delivery!

thank you xend! till next time! :D

34th Manila International Book Fair!

late post! came to the last day of the 34th MIBF with dan and edlaine! super bad weather buti na lang we were still able to enjoy it!

ang saya saya lang! wala lang, i really came to buy a bible and i'm happy with my purchase! secondary na lang yung makabili ng other books though i was nagaalangan pa kasi i hardly read books na. whenever i think of hoarding a lot of novels, i always think na errr may ebook naman eh! libre pa! haha

moa arena view from the parking lot (wala lang! haha)

anyway, national bookstore and fully booked offered most of their novels for 20% off! that's kinda big for really good titles but it's still bordering on the mahal side, so nevermind na lang ako. 

so i bought a bible, came in line for freebies (shempre! di pinapalampas yon! haha), took plenty of cosplay pictures, and hoarded books at the CSM booth! 

all from CSM (except for the clutch bible)

great titles huh? by the way, i'm selling these! just head over to my ebay page at http://myworld.ebay.ph/melodia04 and see my items for sale! 

with Misa of Death Note

there was a cosplay event at the upper part of SMX so we all took the chance to take home lots of pics with uhm, cool cosplayers. anyway HAHA i was never a fan of cosplay kahit na mahilig ako sa anime noon cos most of them look pilit. you know naman how judgmental i am. shempre in order to get our attention you have to be artistahin to really carry a character. it's not just about costume. yung iba nakakatawa na lang eh. hehe

spotted! ramon bautista and jun sabayton 

on the way out we spotted sir RB and jun sabayton! sobrang kulit! they already stopped accepting papictures kasi siguro pauwi na sila and mukang RB was with his girlie pa yata. kaya yun, group picture na lang. haha 

super duper enjoy day! dinner at ate fe's kitchen and desert at iscreamist after! 

2 sisig, lechong kawali, corn soup and chopseuy! busog sulit!

 first time at iscreamist! ang mahal pala don HAHA

orayt! the end! thank you Lord!