Today

I'm so freaking tired I would've loved to call in sick today but I can't afford to lose anymore sick leaves and I have something important to do at work that I really want to get over with as soon as possible.

Today I attended Activity Builder 1, a three-hour morning session I'm required to fulfill in order to complete my training requirements for Philam Life. Bit of a background, if you may. My parents are both financial advisers, with my dad holding a Unit Manager position. And right now they badly need additional recruits or else they'd be demoted, or something to that effect. Anyway, it's bad. So they convinced me to reinstate my underwriting license so that I could become part of their headcount. The only catch is that I have to attend two full days of training. So okay, two full days alright. They told me I could take the weekend sessions, so fine. I agreed. As a favor.

But now, as it turns, I'm not only required to fulfill two days of mandatory training, but frkn four!!!! PLUS, three more halfday trainings. And the worst part?! There are no weekend sessions (I was only lucky to score one Saturday session). The fck right?!

I wouldn't have cared so much if all I had to do was sit during classes and pretend to listen. But this frkn Activity Builder thingy forced us to really engage, and even make actual calls to prospective clients. Wth. Of course, while my classmates were busy scrolling through their contacts, I was calling all the people I know who are still asleep. So I'd get the excuse that they didn't pick up. Heh.

But you know, the trainings are actually good. They're valuable, and they make it a point to really equip you into making that sale. But it's me eh, my heart's not in it. I'm only in for the attendance. I just want to get over it. I'm not interested in making a sale at all. I'm just doing all this as a favor to my parents.

And earlier this morning I felt really ashamed of myself. Here I am surrounded with people who are passionate about turning underwriting into a sustainable source of income for their families, and I'm taking it all for granted.

But well, I may be half-assed about this whole thing but heck I did pick up some bits of wisdom and rhetoric, in random:

  • I learned the importance of goal setting: If you don't know what you want, does it matter what you get?
  • It often takes something painful to awaken us
  • If you don't have to work for money, what would you really like to do?
  • A person without a goal is like a bulb, its light scattered. On the other hand, a person with a goal is like a laser beam, its light focused.
Rrright. 
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